Molly Claire 00:45

All right, coaches. I am so excited to have today's guest, Emily June Wilcox. Welcome to the show, Emily. 

Emily June Wilcox 00:54

Thank you, Molly. I'm so happy to be here.

Molly Claire 00:56

Oh my gosh. It's so nice to have you. So I started this year out. I really am having in my business and personal life a focus on money, looking at my money more often, really cleaning things up, you know, and I think that I know I'm going off on a little bit of a, of a tangent here as to, as to how you and I are here together, but this was the focus of my year and I had my books and I had my plan and then the amazing, you know, world of Facebook, the algorithm brought you to me. So I found Emily's book, Wounds to Wealth. I dove right into it immediately. I started telling my clients, my master coaches, like everyone, you have to read this book. I absolutely love it. And now here we are and I just, I'm thrilled to have you. So thank you for being here and thank you for your amazing work. 

Emily June Wilcox 01:49

Yeah, I'm really happy to be here and I love this story because that's exactly why I wrote the book. I'm like, this work needs to get out into the world in a more amplified way.And so I developed my money healing methodology, I guess, like maybe four years ago. And so I'd had probably 10,000 people who had taken my free money wounds quiz. I had hundreds of people who had gone through my money wound medicine program. And we're just having these incredible breakthroughs. And finally, you know, the universe kind of gave me a nudge and was like, it's time to turn this into a book. And I never, I wasn't someone who like had ambitions to be a published author or really even like had a book on a vision board or anything like that. It was more of, you know, I'm being told to do this and I'm willing to listen. And, you know, hearing stories like yours is just such confirmation that the book was exactly what the world needed and that it's reaching so many new people. 

Molly Claire 02:52

Yes. Oh, it is. It's, it's so fantastic. So Emily is, she's the author of Wounds to Wealth. And I love your work for so many reasons. First of all, you know, over the last decade, as I've built my own business and, and work with so many coaches and train so many coaches, especially women, I see just time and again, coming up against the same limiting beliefs around money, and the same fears and just these cycles that keep us so stuck. And the worst part about it in, well, one of the, one of the worst parts about it in this space is that when we're working with people who are coaches and healers and helpers, there's such important work to get out there in the world. And if they have these limiting beliefs, some of these like money wounds, as you talk about them, it keeps them stuck from being able to actually make their own life better and to actually help other people.

Emily June Wilcox 03:49

Yeah. And, you know, I think so many, especially coaches like anyone who's in the personal development realm have probably all done something that they would put in the bucket of money mindset. Yes. And I think that's really great. And when we put everything in the same bucket, and we really lose a lot of specificity. And so if a client came to me and they were really struggling to save money, they would get these big influxes, like they would sign a $30,000 pay in full client, but somehow the money would be gone. And they were constantly in debt. They were avoiding logging into their bank account. And then I had another client come to me and, you know, they're sitting on like a hundred grand in their savings account, but they're really wanting to step into seven figure wealth and are just kind of afraid to part with the money that they have or make some investments that would help them get to their next level. I think it's pretty clear to most people that the coaching would be radically different. Very different. For these two. And yet we could lump that all in the bucket of money mindset. And it would be like saying, yeah, all silverware is silverware. Right. But I don't want to eat soup with a fork and I don't want to cut my steak with a spoon. 

Molly Claire 05:19

Yes. I mean, I love that you brought that up because, and of course, I would love to have you share some of the specific wounds that you identify in the book. So that will be fantastic. But just, you know, as Emily was talking, I'm thinking about so many clients where, you know, it's like the issue is charging or getting money in the door, right? But then it's like, what we can sometimes find also is that they have this fear that it's all going to go away, right? The minute that it comes in the door. And it's just the other thing that's been so fascinating to me, again, with like trainings, like thousands of coaches and working with so many women is that two women can be brand new coaches, they can be in the same place with regard to their skill set. And one has much more ease charging, much more much sooner. Yeah. And it's kind of like, well, why is that right? It is it's their relationship with money. It's their story around money. It's their expectation around money and these wounds. So I bring that up because, you know, those of you listening, if you are struggling to charge, if you are struggling to keep the money that comes in, if there's anything that is off financially in your business, yes, we want to take a look at, you know, what are the pieces and parts of your business that need to change or be adjusted. And we also want to take a step back and look at like, what is going on for me internally in relation to money. 

Emily June Wilcox 06:47

Yes. Yeah, I think you bring up a such a good point. And one of my favorite quotes of all time that I put in the book is from Carl Young, a now deceased psychoanalyst. And he says, until we make the subconscious conscious, it will direct our life and we will call it fate. And so many of us, myself included, I'm constantly needing to remind myself and coach myself through this as well. We think that if we just change the environmental circumstances and we just get it exactly right, that everything will be different and we'll feel different. And of course, we always actually need to change the inside first and then the outside changes. But when you're talking about what coach is comfortable charging more and that kind of thing, we can really spin our wheels for a long time thinking, I just need to fix my messaging or I just need to change the structure of what I offer. And then if I add more to what I'm offering, then I can charge this amount. And if I can charge this amount and then I just get this many clients, then I'll have this much money and on and on down the line, our brain will go 50 steps ahead. And then it never happens. Why? Because the subconscious always gets what it wants. The subconscious will direct our life and we will call it fate. And so the person who gets the $10,000 tax return and literally the next day has their car die and it's going to cost $10,000 to fix it. That can feel like fate. I would submit that it's actually an unhealed money wound that is running the show in the subconscious and therefore subconscious is creating this circumstance where the money is leaving as soon as it comes. But if we don't have that perspective and that understanding, then again, we can spin our wheels for a long time thinking that some sort of strategy or something needs to change in our environment in order for us to feel differently. 

Molly Claire 09:04

Yes, absolutely. And I, you know, what came to my mind as you were sharing that is thinking about how often I'm working with my clients and It's like we can think it is about ten different little things in the business that need to be changed When it's like when I ask the question How comfortable are you making an offer? How comfortable are you charging? How comfortable are you accepting money, right? And if they're not comfortable with those things then isn't it easier to just focus on trying to fix all the little details, right? And write a different email or do a different opt-in or find a different thing when really what we need to do is take a look at that relationship with money as one of the foundational pieces. And I know you speak to this in your book especially in the beginning you talk about like why would I write why I Emily would have reason to have these big money wounds like my life was not you know, no one would say it had some extraordinary piece of my life around money, right? Yeah, and yet it's there and I'm gonna say that everyone listening to this podcast you've got something with money I think everybody does.

Emily June Wilcox 10:19

Totally. Yeah. And that was like, you know, something that I had to get over when I stepped into money coaching is I had a limiting belief that I needed to have some sort of rags to riches story in order for people to relate to it. And I just had to decide that like, my story was enough and not everyone is going to relate to my story. And that's okay. Either they'll still resonate with my work and take something out of it, or they won't. And guess what? There's thousands of other money and wealth teachers out there and thank goodness, so that they can find someone who resonates more with them. But yeah, I mean, you know, I never worried about food being on the table. Like I grew up, you know, middle class money was the root of all arguments in my household. That was the way that I perceived it as a kid. And so regardless of what your money story is, it's like giving yourself the space to examine that and understand how it's still playing out for you is so important. I remember when I dove into doing some inner child healing, which by the way, it was like a total bait and switch. I thought I was just like hiring a manifestation coach. And then next thing I know, it's like all inner child healing, which was totally what I needed, but I never would have signed up for it. The most fascinating thing for me was to realize how little free will we're actually exercising. You know, we think we are such sovereign beings and that we're adults and we get to choose and we're making, we're blazing our own trail. And really, we're creating circumstances subconsciously that allow us to just completely repeat all of the patterns of our childhood and or we're making decisions that are in rebellion against the things in our childhood, which is still not free will. And so it's totally fascinating. But the good news is, you know, like I turned 40 this year and I think sometimes we think like, Oh, well, you know, if it's been 40 years with this, how long is it going to take to undo it? It's like not long at all, actually. It's just that it's never been examined. And, you know, it's like all it takes is that one flick of a switch and all of the darkness is gone. And the same is true with so much that's in our subconscious. The pattern is just going on autopilot because it's never been interrupted. But the moment that you look at it and examine it and interrupt it, you can totally rewrite your story and it doesn't have to take a long time and it doesn't have to be super traumatic and painful and, you know, all the things. 

Molly Claire 13:06

Mm-hmm. It's like I always think of it as this like hair and attention to what needs attention inside, right? And I think it's I mean, I've so I've so many things to say so many thoughts coming to my mind here. But as you were talking I was thinking about how, you know, in my training when we talk about the nervous system and we talk about these Imprints on our nervous system that are just there right and that is like the filter through which, yes, we have choice in our thoughts to a degree, but right those thoughts and the emotions everything is informed by our experience by you know those imprints on our nervous system and so yeah, I love all of that because yes, we have a choice in what we think and what we feel and if we really want to open up and shift things for ourselves we've got to look a little deeper. Which is what I love also about, you know like with my coaches my training it's you know, we're looking at mine. We're looking at emotion, we're looking at the nervous system, we're looking at actions like we have to take all of it and in your like the money medicine for each wound. You're really talking about how do we go at this from many different angles, right? Different exercises many different things that just makes it more supportive of the person that's healing those parts.

Emily June Wilcox 14:28

Totally. I love the intersection of energetics and strategy. And I think that comes through in all of my work is like, I want to look at what's happening in these unseen realms. But then how do we take it and actually do something with it? Yes, that's right. And I think, particularly in the realm of money, you see so much that's just in one camp or the other. It's all law of attraction. And so it's basically like, just change the way you think and feel. And that's it. And then you see the Dave Ramses of the world that are like, just do this budget and save this much. And it's all action-based. And I just love to sort of meet in the middle and be like, okay, let's change how we think and feel. And then let's take some tangible action that's in alignment with it. 

Molly Claire 15:28

Yes, yeah, and I think because not only are all of those different angles and pieces necessary or helpful, right, for like an integration of all of it, but I think also that, you know, I like to think of it as we all sometimes have a different language we speak in terms of things, right? And so it's like, when I'm working with a client, and if they're really focused on actions, well, we can work on that piece, and then we can also integrate these other things as well that they need while kind of meeting them where they are with what they need. So, yeah, so let's talk about a few of the money wounds. My number one, so Emily has a quiz that you can take where you can identify, okay, what's your top money wound? And then of course, the book goes through each of the wounds and, you know, the medicine for each. My top money wound is the hard money wound. Money is hard. And it makes sense as to why it's there. And I see how it's played out in my life and in my business. But tell me, first of all, all of you listening, you've got to buy the book. I mean, it's a no-brainer. It's on Audible. And it's, I think it's on Kindle. I'm assuming I have it on Audible and then the paperback version. But tell them a little bit about some of the money wounds and what the work looks like in the book. 

Emily June Wilcox 16:49

Yeah, so there are six money wounds and most people will have three or four that are varying degrees of strength for them. And so if you take the quiz, it'll tell you what your top one is. I'm actually working on a more detailed quiz where you can pay for like a full report and then it'll tell you like how strong each of the wounds are. Maybe by the time this comes out, that'll be available. But yeah, so there are six. So there's the money shame wound. I'm not worthy of wealth. There's the evil money wound. Being rich is bad or wrong. The hard money wound. Money is hard. 

Molly Claire 17:31

It sure makes your life exhausting when you have that wound.

Emily June Wilcox 17:35

Yeah, there's the money trust wound, I don't trust myself with money, there's the safe money wound, I won't be safe until I have this financial cushion. And then there's the disappearing money wound, which is money is always leaving, money is going to abandon me, kind of here one day, gone the next, kind of a vibe. 

Molly Claire 17:58

You know, and I think that it's so important for all of us to look at what's going on for ourselves underneath with money in regard to, right, how we approach our finances, how much, you know, financial security we have, retirement, as certainly from a business perspective, right, charging all of that. And the other thing is, you know, as Emily's talking about these different wounds, you can see how you can have two people in a relationship, right, with different sets of wounds, different specific things. And then it's like those wounds, they butt heads with one another, right, in a relationship. And so I think that's the other thing that we don't often think about. How are some of these specifics of our, the ways we relate to money, having an impact on our relationships, for better or for worse? 

Emily June Wilcox 18:50

Yeah, I see this a lot in particular with the safe money wound and the disappearing money wound where one partner will have each. And so if you've got an unhealed safe money wound, you're really oriented towards keeping the money that you have, wanting to be a little bit more frugal, cut coupons, but just like really wanting to see the money grow over time. And so it feels better to hold on to the money than to spend it. And with an unhealed disappearing money wound, it actually feels scary to hold on to money. Because, you know, it's kind of like I'm going to break up with you before you can break up with me. Yeah, right, right. So if I think the money might just leave, well, I'd rather spend it before it somehow just finds a way to leave me, right? And the unhealed disappearing money wound is spend, spend, spend very impulsively and freely. But it's because it's actually scary to be in relationship with money and have it grow long term. And so, you know, the person with the disappearing money wound is kind of attracted to the feeling of safety and stability that the partner provides. And the partner who has the unhealed safe money wound is attracted to the more free feeling energy that the other person has with their willingness to let money go and spend it and enjoy it and circulate it. And so it's like they really want what the other person has. But if they're both unhealed in it, then they get in relationship together. And it's just like very, very triggering. Yeah, just scary. 

Molly Claire 20:31

It's like they're both so scared of the other person and how they address money. I mean, it's a big deal. Money is one of the biggest points of contention in relationships, right? And no wonder because we all have money stuff and most people just, you know, aren't aware of it. So several of my clients are reading this and loving it. And one of the things that I think sometimes while oftentimes I think it can be scary to look at money for a lot of us, right? Maybe afraid of what we're going to find, afraid of what we're going to feel. And I think that there comes a time when you're ready for it, right? What would you say to someone who's listening to this right now? And it's like sounds intriguing, but it's kind of like, well, maybe next year or they're feeling uneasy about it. 

Emily June Wilcox 21:22

Yeah. I mean, first of all, there's really no right time or wrong time. So, you know, I'm a proponent for, of course, like having more transparent conversations around money. And I suspect that people tuning into your podcast, you know, are at least interested in being a fly on the wall for these kinds of conversations. Of course, taking the quiz is a good way to just like dip a toe in the water and kind of see how it resonates with you. You know, we live in an age where there's never been so much access to information, like pretty much anything you want to learn. You can follow certain people on social media, you can watch videos on YouTube and get a really good sense of things. And so really what often holds us back is actually doing anything about it. And that's where, you know, people will join a program or hire a coach or something because, I mean, I do this myself. You know, I wanted to, I think it actually did have to do with my 40th birthday, but it was like, I was noticing at the beginning of 2024, like, I'm just really feeling ready to just like feel like I'm in the best shape of my life. And I think I've got like 10 pounds that it's like, I don't look bad. I don't hate my body. There's nothing really wrong. I don't think my diet's really off. I'm doing Pilates. I'm one of the strongest ones in the class, but it was like a fine tuning, you know? And I ended up hiring a coach only because I was like, I know she's just going to tell me to count macros and stuff. Like I figured all this out from her free content. And I'm like, but there's no part of me that's just going to like, I'm not going to watch the YouTube video on counting macros and then do it myself if I don't put some money on the line. Not because I don't know how, not because I don't have the time, but it's like, I need to pay because that's what's going to show me that it's important. And then I'm going to want to follow through on that investment. And so I think for many of us, that's the truth of what actually gets us paying attention and changing. But particularly if you're a woman and you've been avoiding this, I think we need to address the fact that that's not accidental. I think we just had like the 50th anniversary of women being able to get a credit card. So like get a bank without having a man sign on it. So we've been very much conditioned and we've been like passed down, you know, through our DNA and our ancestry, this belief system and these feelings around our inadequacy towards money, our inability to manage it properly. 

Molly Claire 24:11

Feeling so powerless. That's what I was thinking, you know, this morning as I was preparing for this in my mind, just like how dependent and how powerless and how, like what a tragedy that so many women, like throughout time, have felt stuck in their life or situation because they were afraid of not being able to have what they needed financially. 

Emily June Wilcox 24:39

Oh, 1000%. I have two friends who have gone through divorces in recent years. And it's like one, the only reason she could get away was because she had a successful business of her own. And that just was such a lifeline. And the other one stayed in the marriage way longer than she wanted to because he was the breadwinner. So for women, it truly is a radical act to become more financially independent, to become more financially literate, to look at our money wounds, to decide that, you know, there wasn't just some gene that got skipped in you that makes it so you can't manage money. It's like you can, and you're going to it's not possible to have something like money that we transact with all the time and not screw it up and not make bad investments and not wish you had done things differently. But it's like, get over it. That's okay. You've got a whole lifetime ahead of you. And so can we just make it incrementally better? Yeah. 

Molly Claire 25:59

Yeah, I mean, and so when I was like, how long has it been now? It's been a while now, almost 10 years, eight years, maybe I was going through a divorce. And I remember coming up against some of, I mean, so many fears around finances, so many, you know, things like really realizing that I believe that I could not make the money that I needed because I was a woman just because of my DNA, you know? And when I saw this thought, I'm like, what? How can I think that? But I did, right? And it was pretty deep. And then what's been interesting is as I continued to make shifts and increase my income, my comfortability with managing larger amounts of money, it was challenging. It's like, well, if I have a little bit, right, then I can be really, you know, good at managing it. But then it's just, it's almost like I think that as we grow, I think we need to continue to look at what's coming up now, like what needs to be attended to or paid attention to. But I'll tell you, this is like one of my favorite, favorite moments with my daughter. So, that was my situation, right? I grew up, I mean, we were dirt poor, I had a single mom, she worked nonstop, we never had enough money to, you know, to have what we needed. It was very, you know, I felt disconnected from other people because we didn't have money and just, you know, all these things, right? So, fast forward and I'm, you know, facing divorce with three young kids and thinking, how am I going to make enough money because I'm a woman and I can't do it for some reason, even though that doesn't make sense to say it out loud, right? Well, a couple of years ago, I was chatting with my daughter who's now 14 and she brought up a friend of hers and she was commenting on how much money they seem to have. And, you know, she said, you know, they have this and they have this and they're always doing this and they have this. What does her mom do? She must make a lot of money. And her assumption was that it was the female of the family and not the male. And let me tell you, that was like a good moment for me. I'm like, that's right. Make that assumption, you know? Not because it matters, right? It doesn't matter who makes what and in a partnership, it's, but the point is that like for me to see that she has a view of women that they are capable of creating money and creating stability and joy within money, like such a win. 

Emily June Wilcox 28:32

Yes. I love that. Yeah. That's amazing. I was scrolling Facebook or Instagram not too long ago, and my son, who's six, looked over my shoulder and a picture of me with my book, like an ad, was there. Yes. And he was like, mom, that's you. And then he's like, wait, are you laying in money? And it's so funny because I don't think it was his first time seeing the book, but I was like, yeah. And he's like, oh, he's like, because we have a lot of money, right? And I'm like, yeah. And he's like, okay. And then he's like, have you been selling a lot of books? Because he wants us to move into a slightly different neighborhood and whatever. Anyway, he's got it all connected in his head. Oh my gosh. Yeah. And it's so cute. And I'm just like, yeah, I have. And he's like, great. And there's a past version of me that would have wanted to temper his expectations or give him some sort of lesson about how just because I'm selling a lot of books, it doesn't mean that we're going to be able to get this house that he wants or whatever, anything. I mean, as it is, it's like we live in a multimillion dollar home. We've got 180 degree ocean views. We're not suffering by any means. But it's just like, I can see my own evolution in that kind of conversation because I'm like, you know what? Let him be part of our manifestation. He's a part of the family. And if he wants to live in the neighborhood where his friends live, great. Who am I to stand in the way of that? And I'm just curious to see how it all unfolds. And I'm doing my part, but also I'm just going to let the universe, God source, whatever do its part. And we'll just see what happens. 

Molly Claire 30:30

Yes. And such a gift, right? To give kids that freedom to dream and to lean into possibility and go for what they want and just like have that openness and connection to their desires. Yeah. And it's, I know I can say that's been a really big shift for me just as I've, you know, come into the coaching space and built my business is maybe for the first time in my life, being open to possibilities of things that I never imagined. And it's a really beautiful thing. So hopefully we can all that space for our kids a little more. 

Emily June Wilcox 31:07

Like the energy of possibility is so delicious. 

Molly Claire 31:11

It is, yes. Okay, well, we're gonna wrap up this episode. I would love for you to, you know, offer any parting words to my listeners and then of course tell them about your podcast and all the things. It's just like so many great things that you offer. So last parting words for my audience.

Emily June Wilcox 31:32

Yeah, I just wanna offer words of encouragement, like the fact that you're someone who is choosing with your most limited resource, which is time, to invest in listening to this, says a lot about you and who you are, and that you're someone who has a growth mindset and you're wanting to tap into the energy of possibility. And so just encourage that and recognize that even small changes in your inner environment are the first evidence that your whole life is changing. You always feel different first. And so even if you're just feeling like it's more possible for me than ever before to make six figures or to make seven figures or to get the house or whatever the thing is, or even just to like log into my bank account every week and just be in relationship with my money. I've never considered that before, and now I'm considering it. Like let that be your evidence that you are on the right path and that things are going to continue to get better and better for you. 

Molly Claire 32:42

Love it. Well, thank you so much for being here. Tell them what your website is, what your URL is and your podcast and everything. 

Emily June Wilcox 32:51

So emilywillcox.com, and that has most everything there. So it's got the links to buy the book. It links out to the podcast, which is called The Joyous Path to Millions. There's lots of beautiful, beautiful interviews to plug into there if you want stories of how people did it. And I like to talk to people about their money in those interviews too. I'll ask them like how much they make and that kind of thing, just cause I think we need to demystify it a bit. So that's a good place. And I'm on social media @em.makes.money and I offer a lot of free resources there. And the Money Wounds Quiz, which you can also get to from my website as well. So I would love for those to be the places you start and feel free to message me on social media if there's anything I can do to help. 

Molly Claire 33:35

Awesome. Thank you so much. And I will say any of you that like to listen to books on Audible, I recommend getting the hard copy too, just because some of those exercises in the book, it's really nice to have that hard copy. So yeah. All right. Well, thank you so much for being here. It's been so great to have you. All right, everyone. I will talk with you next week. Have a good one.