00:39

Hello everyone.

00:40

Welcome to this week's episode, where we're going to be talking about how being an achiever, being a do-gooder, being someone who wants to help other people and who wants to achieve can actually create this beautiful, secret, hidden door to what you're really craving.

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How sometimes it can be the gateway to you being able to have the personal growth and personal development and truly the fulfilling of purpose that you are desiring. So I cannot wait to dive into this with you today.

01:14

Right now, as you are listening to this, well, assuming that you're listening to this when the episode is coming out, I am off the grid. So I am right now, as I'm recording this, preparing to go on a river trip through the Grand Canyon down the Colorado River, and I am over the moon excited.

01:34

So let me tell you a little about this epic trip. So my brother is a river guide, and I went on a river trip with him. It's been about eight years ago now. And this was right before the launch of my first book.

01:49

So I remember we went on the river and literally it was like a week or 10 days after that, the Happy Mom mindset launched. And it was such a cool experience because here I was. Because it's totally off the grid, you have no cell service, you have no Wi-Fi, nothing, and you're on the river every single day.

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You are going through the rapids. You're sleeping on the beach. You're hiking every day. You're sleeping on a cot next to the water and just having fantastic food. And it's just such an incredible connecting experience.

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But you're very much removed from what we would call the everyday realities of life, right? And such a cool experience to go through that and then come back and just be launching this book that was just from my heart and soul.

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So it was a really powerful experience. And fast forward to today, present time, it was literally just a few weeks ago, maybe even two weeks ago at this point, that I started feeling called to really get away.

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And I started looking at different options of where I could go. And on a whim, I reached out to Zachary, my brother, and I said, hey, do you happen to have any spots on any of your trips coming up? And he said, as a matter of fact I do, there’s one in August.

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And it seemed like the timing was completely crazy because truly as I'm recording this for you, we are closing up enrollment for life coach and leadership certification for the fall. We're running new ads, which we are watching closely.

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We are launching a book, which I cannot wait to tell you more about when I'm back. It's actually a book where I am co-authoring it with my powerful master coaches. So we've got the book launching, we've got the ads running, we've got the certification and of course the new podcasts and the timing seems a bit crazy.

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And let me tell you that it has turned out to be the perfect time. So I messaged my brother and he was about an hour or two away from being off the grid himself because he was going out for a trip and he called me and he said, these are the details, call the office.

03:52

It would be great to have you, but you know how it is, right? We sometimes talk about plans and we say, oh, I would love to do this. Or this would be a great idea, but it doesn't always pan out, especially with something as big as this.

04:03

So he went off grid on the river. I just decided this is the perfect time. I'm going to trust my team to handle everything. We're going to get all our ducks in a row and I am going on the river and I am checking out and I am going to enjoy this experience before I once again launch a book that is coming from my heart and soul.

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And so it was actually pretty fun. So Zachary was gone. I booked the trip. I, you know, started up moving everything forward and I just sent him a text that said, I can't wait to see you in a few weeks.

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And, uh, so he came back to reality. I use, I say reality with kind of like air quotes because I think we're more in reality when we're in these spaces of nature and self-connecting than when we're in the midst of the daily grind, but I digress.

04:48

So he comes back and it was a, I got his message on a Saturday night. I was out with a friend and his message pops in and he said, “What? I can't believe it. I'm so excited.” So you can imagine he's off the grid and he comes back to a message knowing that we're gonna be together. And there's one more thing about this.

05:06

Thank you for being here with while I tell you this story because I'm sure you can hear it in my voice I'm so excited about it for many reasons and I'm excited to tell you all about it when I come back. But so my birthday is August 25th and Zachary's birthday is the 26th. And I don't know when the last time we were together on our birthdays, but we were probably kids.

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So here we are. We're gonna be in the Grand Canyon in the rapids, sleeping by the river, having the best time, spending our birthdays together, and this is all happening at this very serendipitous, beautiful moment in time where so much is moving forward this work I'm doing here with all of you and this book with my beautiful master coaches.

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And it just feels like a really, really incredible moment in time. So thank you for sharing with me and the fun of all of this. As I said, the day this podcast is coming out and maybe you're listening to it this day, I'm heading into the Grand Canyon and leaving my phone behind and all the details of life.

06:11

So having said all of that, this leads us perfectly into this conversation about taking steps in our lives for ourselves, giving ourselves what we need. And this topic really came to mind because as we've been enrolling in life coach and leadership certification and training, I always have this happen.

06:34

And I have several people that come and it's almost as if they're apologizing a little bit because they say, well, you know, I don't know that I'll really want to build a business with this. I may or may not, but I'm really interested in this.

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I really want this. And always, every time my immediate thought is, this is perfect for you. This is what it's all about. I think it's fantastic when my coaches come and they want to build their business and they want to help other people.

07:01

And we support that. And time and again, my favorite part is watching each of my clients change their lives. And that's what it's all about. And the fact of the matter is that when you take the reins and change your life, when you harness the power of your own growth, of your own development, and you allow your gifts and abilities to be big and bright and bold, you can't help but impact other people.

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So whether it's with a formal coaching business or whatever else you're doing as you're leading people, or whether it's just in your own personal life, in the people you're interacting with every single day and influencing your partner, your children, just all the people around you.

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It's just the best thing. I just was on a consultation with a woman this morning and we talked about this idea, you know, she's really wanting to find her purpose and to serve people and and I said, you know, the fact that you're here today and you have this light about you and this smile and you're taking this in and you're learning and developing you showing up in this energy.

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It's impossible for you to not impact other people. So please take that with you, you know, as you're taking in this podcast today, really think about the power that you have as a human being as an individual to give to others so generously with your light and energy when you as an individual as a person are fulfilled. Okay, so let's talk about the desire that you have to achieve. Let's talk about the ways that you seek to be better, to excel, to improve and to help other people. This is a beautiful desire to have. Last week on the podcast, I talked about the desire to achieve and how we can really ensure that we're staying in that energy of pure desire to achieve without it getting too tainted with pressures and worries and people pleasing, right?

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And if you haven't listened to that episode, definitely go back and listen to it after this episode. But coming back to this episode here present today, this desire to serve others, to help others, and to grow and develop is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

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And sometimes it can be easier for us as human beings to justify investing financially, time-wise, energetically in something that's going to help other people as opposed to ourselves. This is just human nature.

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And especially because we have been taught and conditioned that it is more noble or a better thing to prioritize other people over ourselves. And I think this topic is complex. I think it's nuanced. And I agree in this principle of service and thinking of others and leading with that being a very powerful, powerful way to live.

10:02

And it can also be not so healthy for us when we are self-sacrificing to the degree that we are really not meeting our own needs because that's when it becomes an unhealthy pattern, right? But as we're talking about this today, what I really want to step forward with is you thinking about, do you notice for yourself struggling to justify spending money on yourself, investing in your own development, and truly making it a top priority? I want you to think about this for a minute. What is your relationship with your ability to do that for yourself? And we're gonna look at this without any judgment. Maybe some of you are saying actually that's not hard for me at all, should I feel guilty about that? No. And some of you may be thinking yes I do that and I shouldn't be that way it should be different. No, we don't have to bring any of this judgment, we just want to get curious about it okay and right, wrong or indifferent. It's just good to notice. How do I feel about investing in myself? What value do I perceive in doing that and what could possibly be different if I were more willing to invest in my own growth and development? So these are some questions I want you to consider. And now let's talk about this beautiful like hidden door, this hidden doorway to developing ourselves. So sometimes- and I'll give the example of my clients.

11:48

Okay, so I train Master Coaches, right? They come in, it's a big investment and they're investing their time and energy for a year. They're diving into the fundamentals of lasting change. They're learning all the things about all the niches, right, relationship work and family life and grief and all of these things, right. And they're doing this in the name of excelling professionally in the name of being more confident for their clients, which is all true. And I will tell you that every single Master Coach that has come through my program has expressed to me that this was the best decision they have made for themselves personally and they have expressed time and again that they feel different in their life in their relationship in themselves and it is the most beautiful, beautiful thing because, think about it, if well first of all to completely feel transformed personally.

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What a gift, right? What a gift and think about if these individuals have experienced the depth of transformation, where they have shifted beliefs about themselves, where they have shifted their experience of being themselves, where they have connected with understanding their own nervous system and who they are as a person. You can see that they are then equipped to truly help other people do the same. So it's kind of interesting, right? It's like we lead with wanting to serve others, and anytime we—and I'm including you in this—think about the times that you've invested your time and energy into helping other people into learning something that you can then give back to other people.

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And then think about how the ways that investment enriches you and makes it inevitable that you will be of greater service. So it's kind of this interesting paradox. And what I will say is, it kind of doesn't matter what the entry point is, it doesn't matter if you say, yes, I'm going to invest in this to help other people.

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And then you have this beautiful gift that comes in of help for yourself, or whether you lead with wanting to invest in yourself. The big takeaway and message from this is that when you are thinking about growing, learning, up leveling yourself, please, please, please be open to the ways that personal enrichment exists for you.

14:39

So now I want to go ahead and challenge you to take a scenario in your life and take your mind to a place of getting even more out of life. And then we're going to talk about some specific transformations that I see all the time, which is just a really fun thing to focus on, so fun to focus on the growth.

15:00

So I want you to take a minute and think about an area where you are investing in learning for the sake of others, a place where you are learning to up level, increasing your skills so that you can be of service to others, so that you can make more money, whatever it is.

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And as you think about that endeavor, take a minute to notice the ways in which you are being personally enriched by it. So that's question number one, what are the ways you're being personally enriched by it?

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What are the ways that you are better, that you are wiser? That you are more effective, more capable? And then the next question that I want you to consider is when you think about that place where you are investing and achieving and up leveling, how can you decide right now today that you will get even more out of that experience?

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What if you were to actually reframe that place where you're investing your time and energy and asking yourself, what about this is here just for me? What about this? Can I give myself the gift of this being an opportunity for me to learn this at an even deeper level, to really self-reflect, to really self-connect and embody what I'm learning?

16:36

So hopefully this little bit of guidance here is really going to maximize the degree to which you are benefiting from some of your endeavors. I want to now go and talk through a little bit, some of the most powerful transformations that I see, okay?

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And I think these are the big ones. These are the big ones. So when my clients come in to work with me, whether it's for Level 1 certification or Master Coach certification, they come in, right, wanting to help other people.

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This kind of justifies the investment. It justifies the time. It's crazy how we have to do this in our mind, right? But it's okay, it's okay. As I said, it doesn't matter the entry point. So when my client comes in, what they're wanting to do is understand how do I understand the mind of my clients?

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How do I understand the emotions of my clients? How do I teach my client about their nervous system? How do I put plans of action in place for my clients, right? And what happens as they step into this work is that they are able to pause and take a minute to finally see their own mind, their own emotions, their own nervous system, and what's unique about them. As they do this, they're finally able to understand more about who they are. They're finally able to not just see what's unique about them, but really accept and embrace their unique way of being so they can work with themselves as they transform their life.

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And one of the best parts about this is that as they are able to understand themselves, understand their desires, understand their needs, understand their uniqueness, they're actually able to be and feel nurtured and supported in their uniqueness, feeling more of a sense of fulfillment in their life.

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Now think about this, what a gift. They're coming in to learn how to help others, to understand people. And what happens is, perhaps for the first time in their life, they're really understanding themselves.

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This is one of my favorite things to see transpire in my work with my clients. Let's talk about the second piece of this or step two of what naturally unfolds from here. As my clients are able to understand themselves, know themselves, embrace themselves, and actually live life in a way where they are more fulfilled and more full of purpose, what happens is this ripple effect.

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What happens is they are more calm, clear, and present in their relationships. They are more grounded as they meet with their clients. The ways they're able to show up in every area of their life is completely different because they're finally more in connection with themselves.

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There is so much power in this. And I think the best part of it is that there is a difference between any one of us, any one of you looking at an area of your life, maybe it's a relationship and thinking, I wanna show up in this way and I need to make these changes so that I can fix my flaws, so that I can do a better job, so that I can be more acceptable.

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There's a difference between that versus this process of you actually being present and grounded with yourself and who you are, feeling more at peace, feeling more self-connected, more emotionally connected that actually invites you to be in a place where you're natural behaviors.

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Your natural ways of being in the world and your natural ways of being, for example, in relationship with someone are different because rather than trying to meet some standard or take actions to prove yourself or become different, you're instead taking those actions from a place of authenticity.

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You're taking those actions from a place of living in alignment with your values and who you are and who you want to be. What a gift. And I sort of mentioned this earlier. It's almost like it is inevitable that you're going to show up differently when you know and understand yourself and when you have that sense of self-fulfillment and peace.

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Let's talk about the other really beautiful shift that I see with my clients. Again, they're coming in, ready to help other people, all of a sudden knowing themselves, all of a sudden living more in alignment.

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And then one of the most beautiful things that I love to see happen is them being able to navigate their life with powerful tools because here's the reality of it. We are all going to experience things that are devastating.

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We are all going to experience huge disappointments. Every single one of you here has probably experienced something you never imagined you would and there's more to come because this is part of life.

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And one of my favorite things about working with my clients as they are coaching other people is the fact that they are so well equipped with the mental and emotional tools, not just tools as in something they've learned, but the actual resilience within them and the ability within them to work with themselves to navigate life, to be capable of navigating life.

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And what a beautiful, beautiful thing. Thank you for being here with me as I shared this. And to be honest, this very message today and talking about how stepping into leadership or stepping into, you know, investing in coaching other people or whatever it is where we take these steps for the benefit of other people, and it actually being such a gift to us.

23:16

This is really the reason that I ended up shifting the podcast so recently, because I'm really passionate about helping you. You that is listening, whether you are a coach or aspiring coach, whether you are a mom, a dad, a leader in the corporate world, a business owner, whether you are a seeker who is really desiring to impact the world, you're this ambitious soul.

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What I wanna offer up to you is that it is worth investing your time, energy and resources and up-leveling yourself and within that, give yourself the gift of making it all about the growth you can experience because by so doing, trust me when I say, you will be more capable than you can imagine of having a ripple effect on other people.

24:16

All right, this is what I've got for you. Those that are joining me this fall in training, I cannot wait to see you on the live calls when I get back from the river. I cannot wait to tell you all the stories about the trip and I have to say I am ready to be off the grid and totally disconnected and I am really looking forward to some insights that I can bring and share with all of you.

24:41

All right, I'll talk with you all next week.