[00:00:00] Molly: Okay, Marianne, let's do some coaching. You ready? Thank you for getting up early to have this conversation.

[00:00:10] Marianne: You're welcome. It really, I don't know, it feels pretty good.

[00:00:14] Molly: Yeah, good, good. So what's happening? Tell me what's going on for you.

[00:00:21] Marianne: Well, uh, so many things, so many things, you know, I am in your course. I am finishing my um, AFT practitioner course.

Um, there's, there's just, um, I'm doing my own work, of course. Of course. Yes.

[00:00:44] Molly: Always.

[00:00:45] Marianne: Yes. And, um,

I am at a point where I feel pretty confident with my coaching and my AFT work. But not confident at all in bringing people in and being really visible. Okay. Yeah.

[00:01:14] Molly: Tell me more about what you mean exactly.

[00:01:20] Marianne: Um, well I just, I mean, since we started this course, I just did my, my first masterclass. Mm-Hmm. . Um, and it is.

Now available.

[00:01:37] Molly: I can hear in your voice that you're thrilled that it's available to people.

[00:01:44] Marianne: Actually, I am thrilled on one side. Yes. There's this part of me that says, Oh my gosh, people are going to see me. They're going to hear my story. Yes. They're going to know me. Me. Yes. Yes. Yes. And that's the hard part is that, you know, all my life.

It's been about hiding me. Yes. And not being visible and not having to deal with, um, judgment and, um, things that are, that are, are really difficult about relationships.

[00:02:23] Molly: Yeah.

[00:02:24] Marianne: And now suddenly, um, I'm aware that if I don't do that. I don't get to help all the people that I want to.

[00:02:36] Molly: Yeah. Yeah. So I want to, first, I want to just acknowledge how normal it is that we have these conflicting parts of us, right?

A part of you that's so happy about it. A part of you that wants to go hide under your desk, right? It's very normal. So there's that. And I want to ask you, because. I believe it was last week on our master coach training slack. You posted about feeling so connected with this work and it was really voicing your conviction about the power of the work you do as a coach bringing in EFT.

And I don't remember the exact words, Marianne, but I do remember you saying loud and clear. I will never not do this work. It's too important. Yeah. So I just want to tell me a little bit more about that.

[00:03:40] Marianne: Well, that's exactly what I felt when I wrote it. Yeah. And it's, uh, it's exactly when I, what I feel when I do it.

[00:03:52] Molly: Yes.

[00:03:54] Marianne: Yeah. But in my down times when You know, my, I get in my head, then there's this, Oh, no, you're, you're, you're just, you're not really doing what you think you're doing. Don't take any credit for this. They're doing it, which is true. They're doing the work. Yeah. Um, but, but I get, um, I just get all these doubts.

[00:04:31] Molly: Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So you know this, but I just want to remind you. That it's very normal. That voice is, it's a part of you making an effort to keep you safe, which that part of you believes is keeping you small. So, you know, it's well intended, not very helpful, but very normal and well intended. And I have a question because you said in my downtime, my downtimes, help me understand exactly what that means.

[00:05:11] Marianne: What that means is when I'm not coaching, and when I'm just doing the busy work, the, um, the marketing that I don't love. And. Yes.

[00:05:28] Molly: I'm going to pause there. I'm going to interrupt you and pause there. What is going on for you internally when you're doing the busy work, when you're doing the marketing?

[00:05:45] Marianne: When I'm, okay, it, it, it varies. Okay. It does vary. Um, when I'm doing posts on social media, um, I'm a writer, so I love to write. Okay. And that's very comfortable for me. Okay. Um, but when I have to create something that I really don't know how to do well. Okay. And it's not just about writing, it's about just putting myself out there.

Okay. Um, like doing a video, for example. Then I want to, I basically want to get under a rock, not under my desk. I want to get under a rock.

[00:06:34] Molly: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:06:36] Marianne: Yeah.

[00:06:36] Molly: So, so when you think about the way you feel and the way you felt when you posted that message in our master coach Slack, I can't ever not do this.

It's so important. When you think about that. And then you think about times when you're writing and you feel comfortable and you think about the times when you're doing something that's not as comfortable.

What, what about all of that feels true to you? I know that's a vague question, but just what comes to mind, what is true to you within holding space for all of those different moments?

[00:07:24] Marianne: The first thing that comes to mind is truth is that's my passion. That's my purpose. And one thing I did, I remember I did say in that message that I posted was that I would never quit.

That's right. That's right. A year ago, or even less.

[00:07:52] Molly: Not so long. It feels like a long time ago, right? The truth.

[00:07:57] Marianne: Um, it was more of, I'm just going to quit because this is ridiculous. I'm not making any money. I'm putting out money left and right. Yeah. And, and I have to justify that. I felt like I had to justify that.

But the truth is that I don't feel like I have to justify what I do. Yeah. Because you know it's too important. It's yeah, it's too important. And it's, I mean, that's why I'm working with you is because I know that you can guide me in the, in the direction that takes me into me. Yes. First of all, because that's what we do.

Yes. In everything that we do with you, it takes me into me and then that me is free. But unfortunately it's too free. It's also monetarily free.

[00:09:04] Molly: Perfect segue. Okay. We're going to talk about this, but I want to, I this is what I want to say. Would you believe that I experienced the same things you just said that when I am, when I am connected with this work, when I am working with all of you, when I am totally connected to that purpose, I feel that same sense of, I will never not do this.

It's too important. And that when I'm doing an activity that I don't feel as confident in, or I may have some fears within that I have voices come up for me too. Trying to tell me this isn't going to work. Would you believe that that's true?

[00:09:57] Marianne: I, I believe it. It's hard to believe because just because of you, of who you are, but yeah, I believe it we're all human.

[00:10:08] Molly: It's the exact same thing. But what I want to point out, which is I was going to say pretty amazing, but I want to say just beyond amazing. Is the level of conviction and knowing you have about the power of this work, because I think you'll relate to this, Marianne. I know I can say. I've always felt passionate about this work.

I've always been excited about it. I've always loved helping people. And just over the last few years, as I have gone to this next level of this work, where it is such deep work, I feel. Exactly what you described in your post, which is this is really beyond me. And I can't not do it. It's a different level.

Would you say you relate to that where you felt a conviction and a level, but now it's kind of like, well, there's no going back now, I know, like I have to do this

[00:11:03] Marianne: because it's, it's turned into, it's not just work anymore. It's not just helping people anymore. It's, it's.

It's now ingrained in me.

[00:11:18] Molly: Yes.

[00:11:19] Marianne: It's now part of me and it is me.

[00:11:24] Molly: Yes. So this is what I want to say about that. It's really an incredible gift to have that because that gets to be your anchor. That gets to be the superior truth in all of this, right? Because as I said, think about this and and what you said was This is what I meant to do.

You didn't say those exact words, right? But yes, I'm doing this. It's too important. It means something. Okay. So that is amazing. And that gets to be your anchor. So there's that there's one piece of it. Now, then we have a couple things and I'm not sure we'll quite get to both of them, but we need to talk about the feeling free and being free.

Right. But then, but I want, I want to point to this other piece of this Marianne, which is. When you said, when I'm in down moments, I have these thoughts. And when I said, tell me more about that, you said it's when you're doing something that feels uncomfortable or new. And so immediately what comes to mind and you know, this, because you're in master coach training, you understand the value of attending to and supporting ourselves in moving toward goals is, is what I think is.

What is that part of you? What is that part of Marianne need in those moments when you're doing things that feel outside of your wheelhouse that challenge you, right? What does she need? Because right now, without that support, you'll continue to go into that space and just hope it'll be different. And then you're battling this noise and it's not really helpful.

So what I would love for you to do is take some time to think about. What is that part of Marianne need to have support her in that moment? Is it a reminder of this truth that I know? Is it powerful thoughts or questions to help me get through it? Is it tapping where I'm preparing myself to feel emotionally grounded?

I want so much love and support and compassion. Surrounding that part of Marianne, that you can have more ease in your experience of doing those activities. And first and foremost, stay anchored into that truth that you know about the power of the work you're doing with people.

How does that sound?

[00:14:06] Marianne: I, I mean, that feels so powerful to me, you know, because we, we matter. And, and And what we need matters. And I forget, you know, you teach us that you've been teaching us that, and I forget, I forget that I don't have to, you know, when I work with clients, I put myself aside and I'm right there with them, but I don't have to do that with me.

[00:14:38] Molly: Yes.

And remember, right. That when we, and so many people listening relate to this, I think, especially as women, we spend our whole lives in service of other people, which is a good thing, except. When it is to our detriment, when we are believing that our needs don't matter, when we are believing that who we are doesn't matter, that's where the problem is.

And so it makes total sense that it wouldn't occur to you to say, Hey, what do I need in this moment? Right? Because it's a muscle you're still continuing to build. And hopefully we continue to build it stronger and stronger.

[00:15:15] Marianne: Yes.

[00:15:16] Molly: So for what it's worth, I think you're doing amazing. I mean, I've seen you.

I've seen you, Marianne. I've seen you grow. I've seen you go through your own personal journey and really land in this space that is truly, in my opinion, making the best use of your gift, which is primarily doing EFT and bringing in the coaching background with it. And you know, this, I mean, I think this goes without saying, but I am going to say it because I think it needs to be said, and you need to be reminded.

As much as possible. And that is the, that the work that you do with your clients, where you are helping them with that tapping with their nervous system, with those emotions is something very unique and distinct that most coaches don't have the knowledge of or ability to do. And people need it. Marianne, you and I are both examples of people who knew a lot about self help and had a lot of skills as a coach.

But it was tapping that opened the door to more healing and growth. And you, that is where you get to use your gift. It's such a big deal.

[00:16:35] Marianne: And it's such a privilege. Excuse me. It's such a privilege. Yeah. Really. Yeah. It's, it's every person I work with, it's just such an honor to have that. Ability and to hold their first and their challenges there all of their things to hold that sacred.

[00:17:06] Molly: Yeah.

[00:17:06] Marianne: You know, I, I'm grateful every single day that I've learned this, and, and that, and that I'm learning so much in. It just continues.

[00:17:22] Molly: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I feel the same. I feel that as, as coaches, you know, it is, I believe it is a sacred space that we are invited into to be with our clients. And to be with them in their pain, to know all of their thoughts, not all of them, but as many writers come out, their thoughts, their emotions, like into the, into the, those most personal and intimate parts of them, we get to be a support to them and it's just, it's such a big deal.

[00:18:01] Marianne: !Absolutely. And you know, when I first became a cognitive coach, I was taught. Um, do not work with trauma, do not touch those emotional things in that way. And I was so disappointed because I had a lifetime of trauma. And I thought that's the work I wanted to do. But then when I learned more about clinical EFT and where it's all gone,

[00:18:33] Molly: Yeah.

[00:18:34] Marianne: Yeah. Then, you know,

I work with trauma all the time.

[00:18:39] Molly: It's opened that up. That's right. And I mean, it's true, right? Someone that's just trained in a cognitive model, just using a thought model shouldn't be dealing with trauma, right? Absolutely. And, you know, the training that you have, I mean, what a gift, right?

Because Nobody's exempt from having traumas. It's there, right? It's there. When you're working with a client guaranteed, they have some baggage. They have some stuff going on there. Okay. Marianne. Well, listen, we're, I'm going to end this session here, but I think we should do a part two to talk about the cost of services, but this is what I want you to take in today, because that part of you that is going into protective mode and And bringing all these thoughts for you.

We just need to care for her. We just need to create support and do not, do not never minimize that powerful knowing that you have and the words you posted the other day in Slack. I want you to go in. I want you to copy that and I want you to put it on your desk and remember it because that's the truth right there.

[00:19:51] Marianne: I'll do that. I will do that.

[00:19:53] Molly: Okay, Marianne. Thank you so much. And I'm going to come for you again. We got to talk about this. Okay. Okay. Thanks, Marianne.

[00:20:04] Marianne: Thank you.